Does “getting it” ruin it? Can you have too much seduction knowledge?
An interesting article on Race Depriest (from The Art of Charm) written by Diana Spechler just showed up on Nerve. Here’s a snippet from the last paragraph or so:
“But simultaneously, I’m starting to think there’s a down side to cracking the mystery of social dynamics, to reading body language as easily as other people read the word “EXIT,” glowing red in the dark of a public building. You watch someone talk and know when she’s lying; you watch someone move and know what she’s thinking. If you have a Rosetta Stone for every interaction, you can never again think, This is magical, or, I’m falling so hard, or, Only you can make me feel this way. And without those sensations, without the willingness to relinquish control, without the belief (no matter how juvenile) that chemistry is partly magic, how can you ever fall in love? How can you lose yourself in a moment?” From the Nerve article No More Games by Diana Spechler
These kinds of articles were dense the year after Neil Strauss published “The Game” (which I haven’t yet read by the way).
The subtext to all of them is “Oh my God! These guys are on to us! *Panic* But they’re all creeps! They have to be creeps.” Yeah, whatever.
But the piece itself is very good. The author, Diana Spechler, is brutally honest with herself and with us, her readers, and that’s very refreshing.
Seriously, her worries shouldn’t be an issue. I understand her point of view and her concern, and I hope she gets curious enough to dig a lot deeper. She will find that the true magic of seduction is that the “knowing” about seduction doesn’t reduce the pleasure, either when seducing… or being seduced. It enhances it. Really.
Your knowledge will enhance your pleasure.
Read Zig Ziglar “Secrets of Closing the Sale” to get an appreciation from an astounding salesman… who *loved* to be sold! Yep. A man who knew as much about selling as any man alive, and who throughly appreciated being sold.
Here’s a related example. As you know, Joseph, Franco and I assert that manipulation is a normal and natural behavior for many women, and that we believe there’s good manipulation and bad manipulation (Chapter 13). Once you as a man truly understand “good” manipulation, you will develop a sincere appreciation for this most feminine of arts. Instead of resenting being manipulated, you are free to exercise your choice to accept it or lead her in a different direction.
Ok, gotta go… my girl DZ has finagled me into hanging out for dim sum with her mom at Macau Cafe (Pacific East Mall). Not a problem, I have the rest of her day planned out for my own semi-nefarious purposes.
3 Responses to 'Does “getting it” ruin it? Can you have too much seduction knowledge?'
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Bargaining in a 3rd world country reminds me of this. It was a shock to be openly confrontational negotiations, but after awhile I began to recognize and relished the respect that a hard-bargaining session gave me. It was the mutual respect and conversational tactics that made it fun — not the price/prize at the end.
Playing the game is also the single most effective way I know to find self-reflective people. (Possibly through sheer volume of encounters?) That’s not WHY I play the game… but it’s interesting to me.
jeff_alex
29 May 09 at 7:50 am
It’s like a dance for me. No fun dancing with partners who don’t know any of the steps.
David
29 May 09 at 9:52 am
[...] you can know everything there is to know about body language, courtship and seduction, social dynamics and female psychology, but none of your knowledge in general tells you anything specific about the woman facing you [...]
Why Asking Women About Dating Doesn't Work | Real Modern Man
31 May 09 at 7:20 am